Recently, an unfortunate situation occurred in which I made a decision that led to a whole bunch of other things happening that i did not expect. It was somewhat devastating to see such a domino effect occur after such a decision. Some of these dominos that I’m referring to seemed so unnecessary and uncalled for to the point of not being able to shut off my brain for a few nights because of ongoing thoughts. How could this happen, what did i do wrong, and what can i do make things better or go back to normal were all thoughts going through my head.
After later realizing that these thoughts were not going to help any potential progress, i later realized a bigger lesson moving forward: the events that took place following my decision were out of my control. How i realized this was after some seriously deep prayer and a lot of critical thought. It became clear to me that the same advice i had given those who were seeking guidance was actually the advice i needed to utilize for myself.
When things are out of your control, it may be confusing at times as to if you’ve already exhausted all you can do. For example, moving away for work or for school can be tough especially if you were really connected to your community and your hometown. With moving away comes some unfortunate circumstances like losing friends or just being disconnected from individuals you were once close to. This may occur due to lack of effort or time or just lack of interest. It’s even occurred where a disconnect with someone who was once a close friend occurred due an earlier disconnect with a mutual friend. It was literally a domino effect just by association. As sad or damaging as it is, this is one of those things I’m referring to as out of your control. So whats the point? The point is why are you worried and saddened by something that you without a doubt have no control over. It goes back to that humanistic custom that causes you to worry overtime something unknown occurs but how long should it last. Every person is different in how they deal with things but generally speaking, the Bible teaches numerous times in numerous places to let go and let God.
Romans 8:28 says “And we know that all things work together for good to those who love God, to those who are the called according to His purpose.” This is so important to me because it draws this vivid picture that has not failed me to this day. It is essential to look at the steps of what is being instructed. Firstly, we must know before anything else that we must sincerely love God. After you’ve embarked on that journey, in which you struggle daily, you must understand that the things occurring whether they seem good or bad to the human eye are working for your benefit. When you love God and allow Him to work in your life, you’ve established that understanding that you are letting His will be done. Again, things that are out of your control like losing friends you once had are so small compared to whats really happening behind the scenes. The most overlooked step in this process though is to keep moving, keep loving and most importantly keep praying. Remaining stagnant or becoming too comfortable with where you’re at can be dangerous. There can really be a lesson in anything but you must allow yourself to see it. Things that aren’t in your control, again like disconnecting from close friends, can mean something more than what you think about. God who is in control will never put you in a situation that isn’t good for you because nothing bad comes from Him.
Something else thats really important is not allowing one thing or situation dictate your life or your progress. Yes, a loss can be unfortunate but when you blindly let that loss guide your next move that loss can be become even more damaging. A loss that is out of your control is even more beautiful because you don’t have to blame yourself, you choose to blame yourself. You allow yourself to take on all the pressure but that is a choice you don’t have to make. St. Pope Kyrillos VI says “Rest assured and do think too much about any matter. Leave it to GOD who is in control. Have you known anyone who has trusted God and was let down? Heaven forbid!” This is so beautiful because we’re clearly instructed to not put our nose where it doesn’t belong: things that are beyond us. No one who has ever trusted God was disappointed and thats because God doesn’t disappoint, simple as that. Peace of mind for things that are out of your control are attainable, you just have to want it.